"Twenty-four/Seven"

I take a second to find out what's missing...
Wishing It was You that I'm kissing
Instead of silence that catches the air
instead of you hugging me, I have my hair.
I'm gaining weight
trying to lose it back
trying to shovel and pick and bleed away
every little thing I lack...

Her perfect body
His perfect eyes
Her perfect hair
Her perfect lies
Small waist and muscular thighs.
I'll keep my smile alive in my mind...

You're the only time
I ever feel right
Like I want to be called attractive again
You're the only time
I ever feel good
Like I belong, belong in this over-sized skin
And I'm not Trapped in a state of mind
where my bones are too big,
when I'm around you, I feel like I should.

And I never want to leave your side,
to eat
nor sleep
nor in someone else abide.
nor weep
nor be weak
and in your chest, my heart lies.

I'm taking in my corner surroundings,
no you, no light, nothing good, nothing bright
and I'm not opening my eyes,
I take not my body from these ties.
As again I take in a soft breath of air
I still wish you were always here to hug me
instead of being surrounded by myself and my hair.
3/4/08